Am I cut out for this?

Recently, I have felt God placing on my heart those living in urban poor communities.  It was kinda funny because this started when I wanted to read more about overseas missions.  However, instead of developing in me a heart for missions, God broke me for the poor.  Ever since then, I have been gracefully researching this topic, looking into various ways I could expose myself more to the urban poor, and looking at organizations that are in the business of transforming such communities.


I have seen the prayercasts that Operation World puts on their website (http://www.operationworld.org/join-prayer-movement), and have eagerly soaked in the information about how Servant Partners views transformation in urban slums (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PRiGKTysvcY&feature=BFa&list=UUvDKZb7hpkHbHQ7zAhyyI_g&lf=plcp), but as I took a walk outside my house the other night, I was confronted with some serious doubts and considerations to think about.


That particular night, it was cold--well, cold for southern California, and so I longed to go back inside to be warm.  Then a thought came to me, "There are some in the world--those among the urban poor--that have to deal with the frigid cold, but don't have the luxury of going back into a warm house.  For many, dinner is not just an expected afterthought, but an ever-incessant source of anxiety.  And too often is education considered an extraneous amenity on top of work."


To be quite honest, at that point, I could not give up that source of assurance that I will have warmth, comfort, food, and clothing to live with the poor and be incarnate in the way I show Christ's love.  I could not leave the comforts of my current lifestyle to be with the peddlers, beggars, and impoverished families I had seen in so many videos.  It hurt to even think about living in the cold, sleeping in less than comfortable conditions, and even eating like the poor...consistently and on a regular basis.  I know there is something wrong with this.


If Jesus ate with the poor, served the poor, slept like the poor, ate with the poor, and lived like the poor, what are we to do?  Are we to stay pent up in our palatial houses and ignore the poor living in nations all around the world?  I cannot help but think about such questions, especially as I read through Isaiah 58, and as I see that throughout Jesus' life, He was intentional about being with the poor...He was even born to a carpenter!